Tidbits: One Piece Style
by Embodiment of Sekhmet
Summary: One hot day the Authoress decided to make a plot... Then much nonsense ensued. Includes the breakage of the 4th wall, live plot bunnies, and a story that really isn't very funny at all. Not your average author inserted story, that's for sure.
1. Opening

**Hello everyone! It's been a while right? I found this on my computer. I had written it ages ago but decided to post it because another plot bunny bit me. Yeah... It's stupid, pointless and breaks the 4th wall alot... But it'll be good way to pass the time.**

**So anyway... Read away!**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

By Embodiment of Sekhmet

-

_The Opening..._

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"It's to damn hot!" A girl with dark brown hair and rusty brown eyes complained letting her head drop down onto the hard wood of her desk with a loud 'thunk'. She wore a loose t-shirt and jeans, not exactly the coolest things in the world, but most of her summer clothing was in the laundry.

Her companion, a boy a little older then her with black hair, black eyes and a straw hat nodded in agreement. He looked far more comfortable in his loose red vest and jean cut offs. He also wore sandals, looking like he was ready for a day at the beach.

"It is pretty hot in here, ever thought about getting AC?" He asked softly, taking off his hat and wiping his brow for the fifth time since he had entered the room.

The girl groaned and turned to look him.

"Sorry, but I don't feel like spending extra money on something that probably would break the first time I used it." She muttered. It was the truth, she had a very limited budget and her parents felt like it was waste of money as well.

The boy replaced the hat on his head.

"In other words, you're cheap, right?" He stated pointedly.

The girl scowled and glared at him.

"Yes, I'm cheap, now get over it and go get me a fan." She ordered.

The boy grumbled and got up from his position on the floor to do as he was told.

The girl lifted her head up and stared at her computer screen.

It was too damn hot to pull together enough coherent thoughts to create a story, let alone sit in the hot kitchen (which was were her desk was placed) and read stories...

She sighed as the boy returned with her small fan and set it up on a chair so that it would blow on the both of them.

"Much better..." She smiled at the boy, relaxing as she felt the semi-colder air hit her sweaty face.

"Thanks Luffy!" She said before turning back to the computer screen.

Luffy nodded and pulled up another chair to watch her.

"So what are you going to be writing today?" He asked.

"Well, now that I'm just a little bit cooler I thought I'd write about how damn hot it is outside." She announced, pulling up her trusty notepad with a few clicks of the mouse.

Luffy sighed and propped up his head on his hands.

"Write away..."

The girl rolled her eyes and turned on her music. She stretched her arms above her head and cracked her fingers before beginning.

"And you're suppose to be my inspiration? Damn I thought you'd be a little better then that..." She said sarcastically to the other teenager, who by all rights, shouldn't have even existed.

"I'm too hot to move..." He complained, not at all bothered by the fact that he technically didn't exist.

"Damn straight." The girl, also known as a fanfiction authoress, muttered under her breath.

Thus, the story began...

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**Next chapter's better I swear!**


	2. They say that if it's too hot

**Here is the actual story! Please enjoy the randomness and such!**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

By Embodiment of Sekhmet

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_Chapter One: Sanji and Zoro_

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_**They say that if you can't stand the heat...**_

---

To damn hot...

That was the thought on the mind of the tired and sticky swordsman as he opened his heavy eye lids to face the broiling mid-afternoon sun.

It was odd to be this hot out since the Grand Line weather had been so very cold lately, but the weather had turned so unbearably hot almost over night.

And it wasn't the dry heat that came with the occasional breeze, no this was the sticky, muggy, wet heat, with no wind what so ever. Which meant that the ship wasn't going to be moving very far anytime soon.

Sweat dribbled down from his chin down his neck and Zoro shifted uncomfortably. Sighing loudly he sat up and looked around.

It appeared, that he was the only one on deck, though he doubted it was any cooler below. He could hear the love-cook making lunch in the kitchen and he winced.

It must have been ten-times hotter in there then outside...

Zoro grunted and managed to peal himself off the deck and amble toward the kitchen.

He swung the door open with a loud clatter and nearly fainted with the large heat wave that hit him.

"Holy shit!" He cursed as the door swung shut behind him.

"Indeed..." Sanji replied, busy with his cooking.

Zoro raised an eyebrow at the cook.

It looked as if his whole out fit was soaked in sweat along with his hair, which was actually pulled out of his face by a bandanna that had to have made the damn cook even hotter.

"Enjoying yourself?" Zoro asked crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

"Does it look like I'm enjoying myself cabbage-head?" Sanji snapped back.

Zoro smirked.

He was about to say something else when Sanji whipped around and stomped over to him.

He stuck out his finger and poked Zoro in the chest.

"It is way to hot out to fight right now, so either you make yourself useful or you make yourself scarce? Got it?!" Sanji said emphasizing each word with a poke to Zoro's chest. When he was finished he whirled back around and went back to the stove.

Zoro raised an eyebrow at the cooks actions. He then sighed and turned toward the fridge.

Opening it, he relished in the momentary wave of cold air before grabbing a pitcher of ice water and pulling it out.

Grabbing two cups he poured himself and the cook some water before replacing the pitcher back into the fridge.

Sanji finished cooking and sighed loudly, leaning against the counter for a break.

"Oi, cook..."

Sanji blinked up at Zoro, who offered the sweaty cook the other glass.

Sanji took it and muttered a quiet thanks before drinking the cold contents.

"How the hell do you manage to move in that outfit?" Zoro asked leaning against the counter as well. The were side-by-side, but had a fair distance between the both of them so that neither would be uncomfortable.

Sanji shrugged and took another long gulp.

They spent the next few minutes in silence before Sanji chuckled.

"Hey, do you know what happens to rubber when it gets too hot?" He asked.

"No, what?" Zoro asked thinking of his elastic captain.

"First it becomes more pliable, then eventually it melts..." Sanji said swirling his cup around so that the ice made soft clinking noises against the glass.

Zoro snorted.

"So?"

Sanji smiled and set his cup down.

"Well I'm guessing either Luffy's melted, Nami's tied him down somewhere, or he's locked up somewhere, because normally around this time he'd be in here begging for food..." Sanji stated.

"Ah..." Zoro took another sip of his water, chuckling softly at the thought.

Heat he decided, tended to bring out the oddities in people. So did extreme cold, now that he thought of it. He doubted that Luffy had melted, but perhaps he had found a quiet place to try and cool off. When he had been on deck, Luffy hadn't been at his normal perch so that must have been the case.

Back when he was a kid, on days like these the adults would pass out cold treats to the kids at the dojo sometimes. he hadn't had one in years, but he suddenly found himself craving one as he stood against the counter.

"I could really use a Popsicle right about now..." Zoro said randomly breaking the comfortable silence.

Sanji glanced up at him.

"What the hell is a Popsicle?" He asked, looking confused.

Zoro stared at him in shock.

"It's pretty much frozen fruit juice on a stick. How the hell can you not know what that is?"

Sanji shrugged.

"I was a sheltered child." Sanji retorted walking over to the sink.

"Way too damn sheltered if you ask me..." Zoro snorted.

"Well, you would be too if you grew up with a bunch of shitty old men in a floating restaurant." Sanji snapped back.

Zoro chuckled, though he didn't see how that made much sense considering that Popsicles were food.

"I don't suppose you know what AC is then, do you?" He asked.

"Oh, no we had that on the Baratie, only in the dining room, but it was heavenly..." Sanji said sighing. The blond placed the glass near the other dirty dishes.

Both men where silent for around a minute before Zoro spoke again.

"Ever wonder why the Marines guns look so much like Super Soakers?" He asked again.

Sanji turned and gave him another confused look.

"What the hell is a super soaker?"

Zoro nearly choked on his water.

"Damn! Forget sheltered, you didn't have any childhood what so ever, did you?!" He exclaimed.

"I did too!" Sanji retorted angrily.

"Then how the hell can you not know what super soaker is?!"

"I told you! I was sheltered as a child!" Sanji shouted back.

Zoro shook his head and walked over to the cook.

"Well whatever..." Zoro muttered setting his now empty cup near the sink.

"I'm going to go look for Luffy, see you later cook..." He said starting for the door.

Just before Zoro exited the kitchen he paused.

"You know, you're sweating like a wild animal, so maybe it would be a good idea if you got out of that jacket. Don't want you getting heatstroke on us." Zoro suggested.

Sanji snorted.

"And I suggest that if you can't stand the heat, you get out of my kitchen, you shitty swordsman!" He snapped.

Zoro smirked.

"Then again if you can't stand the heat, maybe it's time we got some AC..." Zoro added before disappearing out the door and leaving Sanji to his work.

---

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**Review if you want, I won't force you since this story is wicked dumb. It doesn't get any better... But if you insist go ahead and keep reading you might be slightly more amused by the next few chapters...**


	3. Intermission One

**.... No comment ...**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

_By Embodiment of Sekhmet_

_-_

_Intermission One_

_-_

---

Luffy blinked stupidly at the computer screen.

"They thought I melted?"

The girl snorted and started laughing.

Luffy raised an eyebrow.

"You know, that really wasn't that funny. In fact it was rather pointless." The rubber captain said crossing his arms.

The girl shrugged and patted Luffy on the head.

"It's not over yet Lulu, so don't get your panties all screwed up in a bunch." She replied.

Luffy scowled.

"I don't wear panties..."

The girl sighed.

"It's a figure of speech... Anyway Luffy, go get me a Popsicle please." She muttered. She really hoped she had spelt that correctly.

Luffy grinned.

"Okay!" He announced turning and dashing off.

The girl rolled her eyes and turned back to her computer. His exit was rather unnecessary, considering that the fridge was right behind her. She gave him points for being energetic though.

"Well, there's Sanji and Zoro, now to write what the others are doing..." She said before pulling up a fresh notepad page. She knew that the last chapter had been rather pointless, as Luffy had remarked, but it was really hard to think of a good plot line when you feel like you're being smothered by the heat. It did seem like the plot bunnies were having a fine time dancing just out of her reach though.

That and Luffy wasn't being much of a muse.

Sometimes she wondered if a dog would be better...

---

**...Wow...**


	4. Find a place that's colder

**Ladies and Gentleguys! Some actual plot! Please enjoy the unique atmosphere... Whee!!**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

_By Embodiment of Sekhmet_

_-_

_Chapter Two: The Others_

_-_

_**...go find a place that's colder...**_

---

Nami growled in frustration as she fell back against her bed.

It was way too damn hot out, and she didn't want to go above deck since she was sure it would be ten-times hotter with the sun beating down on deck. Her comfortable (yet fashionable) sun dress was clinging to her sweaty skin and her damp hair was curling from the heat. The sheets of her bed were cool, but that wouldn't last long, so she enjoyed it while she could. On days like these she felt like just curling up and doing nothing.

But now, she was bored...

And being bored and hot weren't a very good combination with Nami. So with some resignation the navigator pulled herself up off her bed and made her way to the emergency door that connected the her room to the boy's room. Unlocking the door she opened it, relocked it from the inside before closing it and turning around.

Ussop and Chopper where deep into a game of Go Fish and didn't see the navigator enter the room.

Nami smiled and made her way over to the pair.

"Hey guys, whatcha doing?" She asked sitting down next to them.

"Playing Go Fish, wanna play Nami?" Chopper said not looking up from his cards. He looked like he wasn't bothered by the heat, even though he was covered in fur. He was of course in his more human form so he could hold the cards better.

Ussopgrimaced, he had shed his normal hat and goggles, and had his curly hair tied back with a rubber band. He looked better that way, but he wouldn't believe anyone if they told him that.

"Got any twos?" He asked.

"Go fish!" Chopper declared happily.

Ussop grumbled and grabbed his card.

Nami watched them for a while before an idea came to her.

"Hey have you guys seen Vivi or Robin anywhere?" Nami asked.

"Nope." Chopper replied.

Ussop looked up surprised.

"I thought we dropped Vivi off at Alabasta a while ago, why would she be on the ship?"

Nami gave Ussop an odd look.

"Just yesterday we picked her up so she could join us for a while, don't you remember?"

Ussop thought a minute then realization dawned on him.

"Oh! That's why we met up with that weird looking ship! I thought we where just running low on supplies again." He muttered, thinking it odd that Vivi would be joining them. After all, when they left she had made it pretty clear that she couldn't be caught associating with pirates, so why would she-

As suddenly as that thought came, it left him. It was an odd feeling, like his brain had suddenly and spontaneously slammed into a brick wall. Not sure what he had been thinking about he went back to his card game.

Nami shook her head.

"No duh, now do you have any idea where either of them might be?" She asked rather sharply. She hadn't questioned Vivi's abrupt appearance, she had learned from earlier experiences when very odd and questionable things happened not too, otherwise she'd get a headache and feel disoriented.

"I'm right here Navigator-san." Robin replied from one of the hammocks across the room.

Nami glanced at her.

"What are you doing in here?"

"Reading." The older woman answered. Indeed, that was what it appeared she had been doing. She was dressed in a light dress and had an open book resting in her lap. She didn't look the least bit bothered by the heat, which was a little unnerving.

Nami sighed and shook her head.

"Do you know where Vivi is?" Nami asked.

Robin nodded and pointed below her to the blue haired princess who was asleep in the hammock below her. The girl was curled up and looked rather peaceful.

"Okay then! Wake her up and come over here so we can play a game!" Nami announced turning toward the clueless boys.

---

A few minutes later Nami was dealing out the cards to her crew mates, who where now surrounding a small table she had managed to find, a smile etched on her face.

"Ready, I have the the Ace of spades so I'll start." She muttered quietly.

Then she set down two cards face down on the table.

"Two Aces."

"God I hope not, one Ace is more then enough..." Ussop muttered making Vivi giggle sleepily.

He then set one card down on top of Nami's two.

"One Two." He said smiling.

An arm grew out of the table and picked two cards from Robin's hand and placed them on the table.

"Two threes." She stated.

Namiraised an eyebrow and muttered 'showoff' under her breath. Chopper quickly placed one card on the table.

"One four!"

Vivi yawned before setting down one other card. She couldn't seem to shake off the wave of sleepiness fogging her brain at the moment, but she was aware enough to play a card game.

"One five."

And so the laying of cards continued until...

"Two queens!" Ussop announced.

"Bullshit!" Nami yelled.

"Aw dammit!" Ussop said taking the pile of cards on the table top.

Ussop looked at the cards for a second before gasping and glaring up at Nami with an accusing look.

"Hey! Nami you lied every time!" He said angrily.

Nami laughed evilly.

"Yes, I am THAT good..." She agreed with herself.

Everyone stared at Nami like she was nuts for a minute before Vivi cleared her throat (in a sleepy fashion of course, she looked like she would pass out any minute) and turned to Robin.

"Well then, Robin-san, I believe it is your turn..."

"Right, well then, one king." The older woman said placing the card on the table normally for once.

Chopper set down a card.

"One ace."

"Thank the lord..." Nami muttered under her breath.

Vivi giggled and Robin smirked.

"One two!" Vivi declared.

Nami slapped down another card.

"One three!"

"Bull shit!" Chopper squealed excitedly.

Nami sighed and took the cards.

---

The game went on for about twenty more minutes until Chopper, Vivi, and Robin ran out of cards. Then they started over again.

Half way through the game Zoro poked his head through the hatch.

"Hey, have you guys seen Luffy around anywhere?" He asked.

"Nope, two queens!" Ussop declared.

Zoro raised an eyebrow but didn't comment.

"Well I can't find him anywhere and Sanji's afraid he melted or something..." Zoro continued.

"That would be interesting Swordsman-san, but we haven't seen him. One king." Robin answered calmly.

"Three aces!" Chopper said.

"BULLSHIT!!!" Nami screamed making everyone besides Robin jump.

Chopper gave her a sympathetic smile.

"Sorry Nami but I in fact have three aces right here..." He said calmly.

"Man, Nami do you have something against Ace? I mean every time we even mention the word you freak out or have to make a comment about him."

Nami smiled innocently and collected her cards from the center of the table.

"It's nothing, don't worry about it..." She said before she cleared her throat.

Zoro looked confused.

"Isn't his name Trace?" He asked.

"Nah, that's the dub Zoro." Ussop answered casually, highly aware that he had just broken the 4th wall. If it was even there to start with...

"Oh..." He said absentmindedly, then noted with surprise that Vivi was among the group.

"Your turn Vivi..." Nami said nudging the sleepy princess.

"I'm not even gonna ask." Zoro said, having his own fair share of unexplained brain cramps from trying to figure out unexplained things. He pulled his head away from the doorway and left in search of his missing captain.

He was nearly halfway towards the bow of the ship when a thought struck him...

"I wonder if Sanji knows what a Frisbee is."

---

**Holy merciful mother of goats batman! ^_^ I love frisbees! Yhay!**


	5. Intermission Two

**Here's the next pointless chapter. O.o Um, wee?**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

By **Embodiment of Sekhmet**

**-**

**Intermission Two **(As if you really needed another one...)

-

"Wahhh!!! It's raining!!!" Luffy cried, dancing in the driveway with the young woman.

"Finally the heat breaks! I'm in heaven!!!!" She cried lifting her face to the heavens as she twirled around like a maniac. No doubt the neighbors where staring at her, not that she cared at the moment.

Luffy laughed and shook the rain off his hat. He did a random cartwheel before pausing before his compainion.

"Hey I have question! Why did you write Vivi into the story?" He asked.

His compainon laughed and glomped him.

"Well my dear Lulu, I have great plans for her in the future! So I had too!" She said squeezing him. He didn't look the least bit bothered but still had another question.

"But she's not suppose to be there, how can you just put her there unexplainably?" He asked.

"It's called a plothole, which is something that you and your fellow non-existing friends can't possibly comprehend, without your pretty little heads going 'splody! Thus why we writers make sure that when we use a conviently placed plot device, or encounter a plothole, that you can't think to hard on it!" She explained cheerfully.

Luffy frowned.

"Huh?"

"Exactly! Now swing me around!" She squealed.

Luffy grinned and swung her around a bit.

A large flash of light illuminated the sky, followed by a thunderous crash.

Causing both of them to rush inside.

Once they where both seated behind the computer, very cool, and very comfortable, (though both were completely soaked) the girl pulled up Notepad.

"Now let's continue the madness!" She said cheerfully.

"Why haven't I shown up yet?!" Luffy inturupted pouting.

The brunette shot him an odd look.

"Um, becuase your here..." She replied, as if it was the most ovbious thing in the world.

Luffy blinked.

"Oh."

The girl shook her head and turned back to the computer and started to type-

But Luffy qiuckly pushed here a side an began tieping on his own. Frist he made Asse apear be side him then-

The fuming brunette shoved the rubber captian aside and took control again. She glared at the messy writing on the screen, which had many typos and spelling mistakes and then she looked at Luffy with her eyebrow raised.

"Just how old are you?"

Luffy smiled innocently up at her.

"Seventeen... Why?"

She cracked a grin.

"Asses?"

Luffy blinked.

"Huh?"

She turned and pointed to the screen and Luffy looked over her shoulder.

Luffy shook his head.

"No that says Ace."

"Oh..." The girl blinked and looked over at Luffy's older brother, who was standing near the sink, staring at the pair blankly.

"That's spelt A-C-E, not A-S-S-E." She said looking back over at Luffy with a grin.

"Oh, well I didn't know that." Luffy said with a shrug.

The girl slumped, a scowl making it's way on to her face.

"Apparently..." She sighed and rolled her eyes before pushing Luffy aside and standing up.

She walked over and grabbed Ace by the arm, dragged him over and sat him in what was once Luffy's chair.

Luffy pouted.

"Hey! That's my chair!" He said childishly.

"Well Lulu, you can always go get another one."

"But I like that one!"

"Well Ace is in it now!" She snapped.

Luffy huffed and turned to go get another chair.

Ace blinked then turned to the girl.

"Where the heck am I? And who the heck are you?" He asked sounding quite alarmed.

"The first rule of this place is... We don't ask questions... Mainly because you won't recieve any answers my dear Porty-poo! Now then, before Luffy returns and tries to make me write something stupid again, let's continue!" She exclaimed her hands flying to the keyboard.

Ace blinked stupidly.

"I'm so lost..."

---

**I do not own One Piece or any of it's characters... Yhay! Ace showed up! Ace is so cool! *fangirl squeal***


	6. Or hope it rains soon

**Back to the actually story!**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

By Embodiment of Sekhmet

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Chapter Three: Or hope it Rains.

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_**...or hope it rains soon...**_

---

Sanji sighed and finished putting the fianl touches on lunch. When he was finished it would be a masterpiece fit for royalty. (Even though he couldn't quite explain what he was making.)

"There! All done!" He declared before taking out the bandana in his hair and letting his golden hair fall back into his face. (Rather dramatically actually, complete with fangirl sparkles)

He ran a hand through it before turning and walking toward the door. He shoved the bandana into his pocket and walked out onto the deck.

It was vacant of the entire crew, save Zoro, who was standing in the middle of the deck, deep in thought. (Which was odd for the swordsman, since Sanji was off the opinion that the man didn't think deeply about many things.)

Sanji shook his head at the swordsman and made his way toward the enterance to the sleeping quarters.

"Bullshit!" Someone screamed loudly.

Sanji raised one delicately curled eye brow as he entered.

"Lunch is ready everyone." He said loudly.

"Thanks Sanji-kun! I could really use something to eat!" Nami declared getting up and setting her card face down.

"You only want to leave because you're loosing!" Chopper acused.

Nami stuck her tongue out at the reigndeer and turned to leave.

Everyone else followed shortly after.

---

After lunch was over with the crew found themselves up on deck staring up at the now cloudy sky. (It was amazing how fast people tended to eat, almost felt as if no time at all had passed since they stopped playing that game of cards.)

"Looks like it's going to rain." Chopper said. (Well that was obvious...)

"Good... I could use a break from this ungodly heat!" Nami said flopping down onto the deck. (Rather gracefully actually...)

"Hey cook? Do you know what a frisbee is?" Zoro questioned.

"Would you just shut up?!" Sanji replied in an annoyed tone.

"Hey guys, Luffy wasn't at lunch, do you think he might have fallen over board?" Ussop asked.

"The love-cook thinks he melted..." Zoro stated.

"I did not say that you shitty-swordsman!" Sanji retorted beginning to get angry.

"Well whatever happened to him must be pretty bad if he missed lunch." Ussop said looking towards the goat head where Luffy normally sat.

"Indeed..." Robin said softly.

Zoro shot Sanji a funny look for a second but then looked over at Vivi who was leaning over the railing, staring sleepily at something in the water.

Curious Zoro walked over and took a look for himself.

He was very surprised at what he saw.

"Well, what the hell is that?" He asked no one in particular.

"Kind of looks like a duck." Vivi said looking at the strange bird that was floating along side the Going Merry.

Zoro froze for a moment.

"Why the hell do I have the sudden urge to throw the crap-cook over board?"

Vivi looked up at him.

"I don't know Zoro-kun, but maybe you should go lie down, the heat can affect people in strange ways..." She said calmly.

"Hn." Zoro replied before going to find someplace to sit. What she said was true, he had been feeling rather out of character lately, though that wasn't proventing him from fighting with Sanji at all.

When Vivi looked down at the strange bird again, she found that it had dissappeared.

She turned and was about to ask a question when suddenly the sky broke open and a heavy downpour drenched the entire crew...

It actually felt more like a bucket of water had been dumped over the entire boat before it settled into heavy rain.

Everyone just kind of stared at each other.

"Well..." Sanji said glancing down at his wet clothes.

"At least we aren't hot anymore..."

---

**(I do not own One Piece or any of it's characters... If you are still reading this then I'll let you know that it get's better in two more chapters.)**


	7. Intermission Three

**Wow this is the shortest chapter yet. The next chapter is funnier and a heck of a lot then this one. Click the next button... Please...**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

By Embodiment of Sekhmet

-

Intermission ....uh.... I lost count... (*Sweatdrops*)

-

"That was the stupidest thing ever! It was short and had no point what so ever!" Luffy complained loudly.

Ace glanced at his brother briefly before nodding. He was still horribly confused, but found himself agreeing wholeheartedly with his sibling.

"I agree, it really wasn't that great." He muttered.

The girl slumped forward, groaning and her forehead hit the desk with a loud 'thunk'.

"I had no idea how I was suppose to end that!" She said pouting. It was the truth after all. It felt like the plot bunny that the story had been made from had just been suddenly ran over by a semi and was being devoured by meat-eating squirels.

Mmmm, roadkill...

Luffy jumped up and down. Inturrupting her thoughts.

"Can I be in the story now? Please? Please?!" He squealed.

The girl glared at him. She wasn't sure there was going to be much of a story now, thanks to the death of the plot, but if that's what the rubber captian wanted.

"Fine!" She yelled reaching with one hand toward the keyboard and tapping a few keys.

He vanished.

Ace sweatdropped.

"That was more then just a few you know..." He commented.

She growled and typed a few more in.

Ace's narcolepsy kicked in and he dropped to the floor asleep.

"Few keys that looser!" She said and stuck her tongue out at him. She waited a few minutes before she sighed sadly.

"It's not as fun without Lulu!" She whined.

And she had no idea what to write. In fact, she didn't think she could continue this story anymore, it really wasn't that entertaining, and seemed rather pointless.

It appeared though, as if the now deseased bunny in her head had done what rabbits do and so eventually it's spawn would grow up and attack her again. But who knows how long that would take, probably years... And it seemed as if it wasn't even a One Piece bunny it mated with...

Not that she was studying her plot bunnies at all, no sir, she didn't question the little buggers.

Leaning back in her chair she crossed her arms and debated whether she wanted to continue.

Ace chose that moment to let out a loud snore and she grimaced.

"Maybe later..." She said getting up and walking away.  
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**(Click next now... Please...)**


	8. Not an Intermission

**Fast-Forward to the present! This chapter is better I swear! ^_^**

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Tidbits: One Piece Style

By Embodiment of Sekhmet

-

_Not even an intermission... _

_-_

A young woman glared at her laptop screen as she was laying on her bed. She had long brown hair, streaked purply pink, and matching purple-pink eyes. Her faithful dog, Jamie Jess was taking up leg room at the end of the bed ignoring her as she stared at the screen.

"Took it long enough." She stated to no one in preticular.

Jamie pulled his head up and shot her a bored look before going back to sleep.

The woman rolled her eyes and brought up the story titled 'Tidbits: One Piece Style' on her computer. She hadn't looked at that in years, and reading it over again she scowled.

"This is utter crap. How could I write this stuff?!" She asked again.

_'Easily,'_ She thought she heard a voice, probably of that now fully matured plot bunny spawn in her head.

She raised an eyebrow, waiting for the manifestation of the continuation of the impractical story creator to speak again.

_'AH! Quit using such big words! It scares me!'_ A squeaky voice said.

She rolled her eyes. Still waiting for the bunny to tell her what the heck was going on.

"That better?" She asked.

_'Yes thank you. Anyway, it's very easy, you see, when the human body is under certain stimulus, such as extreme heat, depression, or happiness, us plot bunnies tend to become stronger! However when that stimuli is taken away, bam! No more nippers for the kipper!'_ It announced.

She looked annoyed, and slightly embarrassed that that creature was inside her head.

"So I'm going to assume that because I stopped being so hot that it caused a momentary lapse in judgement by your predessor, thus resulting in his messy death at the hands of a semi-truck and meat-eating squirels?"

_'Correct. I'm here now because your boredom has allowed driven you to desperation and-'_

"JAMIE! HI!!!!"

Instantly all intelligent (or not, depending on your point of view) thought processes stopped as another person entered the young woman's personal domain. The domain being her room, the person being someone with a habit of interrupting thought proccesses and thus known as a serial plot bunny murderer.

The bunny squeaked and ducked for cover, not that it would save it, and Jamie let out an audible groan as he was roughly petted and had his personal space invaded.

"What are you doing in here again?!" She nearly screeched.

"I just came in here to see Jamie. No need to yell." He said remarked.

"Get out of my room!" She said.

"Why?"

"I don't need a reason! Scat!"

"I'm not doing anything!" He replied.

"Get out before I throw something!"

"All I'm doing is saying Hi to Jamie you it's no reason to get so upset!" He argued getting up. He was probably looking around for plot bunnies to kill...

"Get out!" She said again, clenching her fists.

This whole time she had been talking to him, he had been smiling knowingly (and stupidly) at her and trying to tug her dog away from her.

The plot bunny hiding let out a squeak of terror as it realized it was slowly shriveling up. It's powers weakening under the onslaught of pure bunny destruction.

"Get out now!"

"Geez." He muttered before obeying. He'd be back, she was sure of it.

After a few moments of recomposing herself, the woman sighed and glanced at the plot bunny who looked half-eaten.

"So that now? It's obvious that it's been way to long for me to pick this back up and- Hey when did you get out of my head and become tangible?"

_"A little bit after the bunny killer came in."_ It croaked.

The woman scrolled up, found the section when that happened and nodded.

"Oh, okay... So, back to my question..."

_"I think you could probably add that other One Piece humor short you have saved away, then move on to my genre."_ It croaked again.

She raised an eyebrow before remembering.

"Oh, the one about the blow up sword? I can do that. I'm still not sure that this is worth publishing at all... It's retarded." She added.

_"I agreed."_ The bunny said, getting a little healthier and bouncing over to her side. Jamie looked up and shot both of them a 'WTF?!' look.

She ignored him. The bunny looked confused.

_"Wow, I didn't know animals could be so exspressive..."_ It said, it's black ears twitching in the direction of the animal.

"Yeah well, that's why I like him. That and if anyone walks in on me talking to one of my muses it just looks like I'm talking to my dog instead." She replied.

_"Oh... Convient plot device?"_ He suggested.

"Uh, yeah, I guess so." She agreed, typing away, making some edits to the 'Tidbits' stories. She was adding detail, and making sure it sounded right.

_"I can see dead plot bunnies."_ The plot bunny murmured in a shaky whisper, his pink eyes wide and scared.

"That's just my writing folder you dub." The woman stated glancing briefly at the long list of notepad files.

_"So many uncomplete stories! Oh the horror!"_

"Shut up before I decide not to write you." She snapped, not once taking her eyes off the screen. Her fingers flew across the keyboard, well, not really flew, they were still attatched to her hands, but... You got the point.

In the meantime the currently unnamed plot bunny decided to have some courage and cautiously approached Jamie. It poked him and Jamie shot him a 'do it again and I'll eat you, you figment of my master's imagination.' look.

The plot bunny just stared in amazement at him.

The woman just rolled her eyes as stupitity abounded.

---

**(Funnier? You bet. The next chapter isn't as much... It comes and goes... Honestly!)**


End file.
